waiting

i realised i get too affected. but then again its just God tellin me, "hey this is a soft spot of yours I'd like you to see, that ur insecurity makes u very shaky." It was a testing day today, I was in a state btw isolating myself and frustration as well as just full of unneccessary thoughts. My mind was very distracted, I couldn't connect with anyone and today just felt weird. Anyway I know there is some sense of insecurtiy in me and I can identify it and I reli thank God tat this is another thing to give to Him. Hai, sometimes I just can't understand if ppl reli mean wat they say and if ppl are who they say the are and live up to it and don't change mask in differing circumstances. And I know this are things I hv to face, and i reli need God to comfort me because honestly in life ppl are ppl and wat do ppl do best? being human.... But still i dun wanna be the one who complains but be the change. But all according to wat He wants not wat I want. Maybe he doesnt want me to be wat i want to be? anyway daniel showed me an interestin webbie tat has encouragin stuff and this lil poem or thoughts shd i say are kinda applicable to my life for now and reli how wonderful tat a God of promise when He says wait, it just gives us the Hope tat He will do wat He says...


Wait
Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait."
"WAIT? You say 'wait'," my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers.
I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened?
Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked and am claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate hangs in the balance,
and YOU tell me "Wait?"
I'm needing a 'yes'', a go-ahead sign, or even a 'no' to which I can resign.
And, Lord, You promised that if we believe we need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And, Lord, I've been asking! I need a reply!"

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut. and grumbled to God,
"So I'm waiting.....for what?
"He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, cause the mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want — But you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just be knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see:
You'd never experience the fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save (for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart,
The glow of My comfort late in the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked Of an infinite God,
who makes what you have LAST.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that "My grace is sufficient for thee,
Yes, your dreams for that loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh, the loss! If I lost what I am doing in you!"
"So, be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, "WAIT."
Author Unknown
"When the wounds of my heart need healing,
and my broken dreams need mending .... the Lord tenderly meets me,
lifting my cares,
erasing my fears,
restoring my hopes.
Like a fresh breath from heaven, God touches me .... and I am whole again."

i'm just amazed...heres somethin to think abt, a spiritual giant can be an emotional dwarf? True aint it? boy am i such a dwarf....hahas