november rains...

in a sphere feeling everything is not within control. Its like losing grip of somethin. Now that dec has started, it somehow started on a sour note... NOting how lil wkends i hv and dat today is a day of seeing some faces i get to see only once a yr for the nxt dunnoe how many yrs of my life... I feel so robbed dat it just had to happen as such... Plus i guess another feeling is dat, i guess i hv to live a life dats so unpredictable. Its not as if i hv a choice or wat. If i did i would put everythin in it lar...but...

Wat do we do when nobody listens?
Who do we seek when everything seems silent?
When you go unheard, who'd bother?
AS much as I'm overwhelmed by me
Who stands out in the midst of this darkness?
Who'll stick out his hand and pull me through?
Who'll say those three words and lend me a shoulder to rest on?
AS much as I'm overwhelmed by me
Who'll be beside me?
Who'll say I'm not alone?
Who'll say let's carry on?
WHo'll say let's sit and pray as we go through this together...
As much as I'm overwhelmed by me
I conclude...
Nobody but You will fulfill my needs...
Nobody but the very warmth of Your words will soothe my soul
Nobody but You can lift my life frm this silence
NObody but you can make me see and jump for joy
NObody absolutely nobody can calm this frustrated heart
I conclude...
I'm missing You again
And it's me who let's You go
And it's me who just forsakes you
And it's me who looks upon my guilt
And it's me....
Not you because I need You

Sometimes I feel tat its no pt telling how you reli feel. Because honestly I think its just my character to not say wats inside lest I be provoked to say it. But most of the time when I do I just implode. And wat comes up is a mesh of things tat reli dun make sense... HOnestly this feelin is probably close to that feelin on the night when i slept staring at the stars all alone. BUt its no pt repeating it, the past built me to who I am...

If i let it repeat it just means I didn't learn. BUt am I in the verge of closing up? Someone throw that wrench to kp me open...

I've been v.emo lately...I guess its frm the fact I'll be leavin my boys and embark on a new journey with my new boys. As if there is no closure for me. But even if there isn't I just pray for strength and perseverance to carry on. ALso i guess its becoz this dec, is tough. ANd i pray ppl understand. ANd i just kp doin my part. ANyway I've gotta go now. And i guess now i noe why they say november rain...

its another chapter closed, and the memories will just remain as it is...till we meet again someday on this journey called life...