the waitin moments...

what would one do if he found out things didn't go the way that he thought it would?

Somehow had this gut feelin dat i would find out whr tat sweat and tears went to. And yea in the process of accepting it, it's disappointing yet wat else could i do? To go straight to the pt, I din get in to the place i applied to. And yea i guess it would be normal if I'd just sulk and moan how unfair bla bla life reli is and mope and complain and all and stuff. But honestly after readin the letter I knew in me that yea, ok I guess its back to the drawing board. :D

I guess my feelin is dat i'm looking forward and smiling tat at least there is another chance to reconsider this nxt step. Time seems to be on my side. But I guess the bigger picture is really tat I hv God on my side.

Honestly who wouldnt be sad and broken over this. I'd say its an experience and its no harm tryin again. Kinda recalled the story of this guy who tried 3times to get into a university and when he did he ended up excellin pretty well. And I guess to me wat i can gather at this moment is tat do i reli need to go to uni? ANd I guess this will give me more time, rather than rushin my future, to find out other avenues I havent considered. I know tat all things worketh for good to those that love Him, and this is another experience.

Dun get me wrong dun think i'm down and out, I dun think i'm hopeless, its not necessary all the time tat one needs to go to university to end up doin the things he wants to do, and now I'm gonna wait upon the Lord on the next step. I guess be it through ppl, circumstances and stuff. I I hv to look out for courses as well as opportunities. I know wat I wanna do, I've found my "sweet spot"(an area that u find satisfaction and are good in) but I hv to trust in Him for wat will happen next because for some it may hv been the end of the road but to me its not and whr I go I knowest not(yet it doesnt mean i dun do anythin abt it). I'm placin all hope in HIs promises.

Recountin the thing about applications, hv a few frens who r checkin their medicine results(meanin if they got admitted), hv this bunkmate of mine who placed all hopes in this course alone and he once said he'd be terribly disappointed if he din get in and would feel hopeless and so on. But yea I guess u get wat i mean.

Who do i turn to?

When all is downcast?

Where Hope seems like grasping for the wind...

But If I had all this would I be contented?

WOuld I still rely on the only one above?

Who has guided me, comforted me for this few mths.

Sent me ppl to confide in and to put a smile on my face

And remind me tat all is not lost.

The only direction I hv is wat lies in front of me,

It may appear dark and uncertain

Yet I know in due Time I will see

I will do my part

For I know that He hasn't forgotten me

I will not compare

For maybe this is the path I shd take

A longer one?

A more fruitful one?

One tat would make me who I am suppose to be

When the world ridicules me

Looks down on me

My friends abandon me

I know You are beside me always

You will hold me up

And I will stand up again

For I am a stubborn man

Stubborn in the things I hold dear

Its in these waiting moments once more whr the testing seems clear.

I hv been taught to not lose hope. I hv been told not to dwell on missed chances and on the past. I hv been reminded to persevere and TRUST always. I have learnt the meanin of carrying on. After all life is not just abt careers, dollars and cents, taxes and all this material things. Because all this can be taken away even frens and family. SO who am I to sulk? Its just part of this long journey of life. There is more to this. I know.