on the brink....

honestly after this wk i reli dunnoe how to feel. Too much happenings and too much things tat just bang at this head of mine. reli i'm treading on a thin line btw depression and just breaking down and not doin anythin. reli after today, its just been tough. reli many shocks many things tat i reli have to pray abt for strength and peace. and reli last nite i just wanted to wallow out and cry at the entire situation. i'd say i reli feel helpless. these are ppl under my charge. ppl who in 12days pass on to the "real" life tat awaits them beyond the shores of my sunny island. and today playin the investigator and tryin to link up events in the entire fiasco. I hv to admit my boys are playful but i nv thought it'd be as bad as it seems and it only surfaces now which just shows how things hv gone and the kind of ppl i hv under me. Anyway honestly reli tired of elaboratin but just wanna say tat in life, there are things we shd never experience and totally treasure it for sure. once u see someone;s freedom taken frm them u'd begin to realise how precious livin a life tats right is to u...well for me tats how i felt, i dunnoe abt u....anyway i'm reli on an impulsive spree... was alr contemplatin my nxt purchase when my pay comes out and i noe its an impulse buy but yea wat to do...i guess i reli hv to go back to Him and reli just cast it all upon him. n i noe he's reli puttin me through the fire to make me see who i reli am and reli to fit myself in the mould of me. anyway i'm tired. goin for a run in 7hrs. reli i just feel like runnin and feelin the cool sea breeze ruffling my hair. and most imptly runnin thoughts of praise and thanksgivin to him.
somethin tat came to me...

is 45:2....